Men make me sick I almost wish they didn't exist Who could ever predict? A tragedy such as this In my own home While alone Tears soak the same pillow where he once laid his head Everyday I am forced to sleep in the same damn bed Where I once drew blood of my attacker Why did I shower later after? Stupid. So the only evidence they had were my clothes and his blood on my sheets He was released after a few weeks I found out the news and tears watered my cheeks I would drink to numb the pain but the memories were still haunting Death was the only thing I was wanting Men make me sick He taunted me in a sing song voice I was forced to have no choice He laughed as I begged for his mercy The walls are thin someone will hear me I thought But my cries for help didn't help I had to endure that nightmare by myself I was nothing but kind to a stranger That same kindness put me in danger I beat myself up for months pointing the blame to my reflection I was looking for love and affectiom Must've took a wrong turn and lost my direction Men make me sick I'm forced to reminisce I Live in the same place still, so the painful memories they stick The sweaty vivid flashbacks still hit I baracade my door sometimes out of fear he will return I feel the pressure and the burn Is this another lesson I "had" to learn? Will there be another purple heart I will earn? I know life is a battle and we're all fighting our own war But sometimes I lay in this bed and wonder exactly what am I fighting for?