To old Iohn Heywood the Epigrammalist, wheresoeuer
E PIG . 293.
O LDE Heywood, haue with thee, in His od Vaine ,
That yet with Booke sellers, as new, doth remaine.
New Poets sing riming but thy rymes aduance
Themselues in light measures, for thus they doe dance
He gather some Prouerbes thou gatherdst before,
To descant vpon them as thou didst of yore:
But yet not as thou didst for now that were sin,
But as my Muse prompteth, — and thus I begin.
" The good or the ill of all a mans life
Is the good or ill choice of his good or ill wife"
Prouerbiall rime thy reason I loue,
Yet may not thy reason with reason approue;
Sith there is more good and ill in this life
Then there is in choyce of good or ill wife
For soueraigne GOOD is heere to be found,
And the like EVILL: for both heere abound:
The first being life, the last being death,
Excells both the other aboue and beneath.
But of this life onely acknowledge I must
It is most vndoubted what thou hast discust:
And as my rimes iumpe in scanning thy sence,
So iumpe I with thee in iudgements expence.
" The Faire lasts all the yeare:" so Londons doth;
And yet most fowly lyes each house and booth;
Which fowly lye, to vent their marchandize:
Then better t'were it ly'de not as it lyes,
Or that an howre the Faire might fully end;
So should the Faire (though fowle) the lesse offend
" The weake goes to the wall:" Then Lesbia's fraile:
For still against the wall men run her
" Lalus the Iudge sets foote in Malus cause:
Thus with his foote the beast still handles lawes
" The blinde eates many a fly:" It's true indeede;
And so may Seers do for want of heede;
For he that writes the Bible in a nutt,
Hath married with a light and filthy slutt
" Little or nothing said soone mended is:"
But they that nothing do, do most amisse.
" Strike when the iron is hott:" Then Quintus, Ioe
Thy whore, — (that can, like iron, all heates endure)
Is now made hott; yet strike her not too low,
Least shee giue thee a clappe, thou cans't not cure
Phrina (hot whoore) " takes pepper in the nose"
Because her noses pimples some call poxes;
Wherewith she peppers both her friends and foes.
So makes her nose and poope, two pepper-boxes
" A faire threed, Captaine Porcupine hath spunne:
For he his threed of life hath quite vndone:
Call yee that spinning that vntwines that threed?
Then did he (hanging) spinne till he was dead.
O Hercules, what meanst thou so to spinne,
To loose the glory which thy fights did winne!
" Hee's Iacke out of office, that Iohn was in it:"
Then Iohns prouing Iacks, lacke honesty or wit;
But let me be Iohn till I be a Iacke:
If I loose my office let my necke cracke.
" It's better sit still then rise and fall:"
So tradesmen should not occupy at all
" Misrecking is no paiment" (it is said)
Yet some misreckon being truly paid:
For Dalia that a month hath not been wed,
Is ere the time she reckond, brought to bed
So then I hope it may be truly said
Though she misrecond she was truly paide.
" Still Fucus casts beyond the moone:" and why
The moone still casts him into Lunacy
" The greatest clarkes are not the wisest men:
Much lesse the least are: Who be wisest then?
For if wee meane clarks meanely wise esteeme,
Then wisest, who? the great that small do seeme
They say that " many hands light worke do make:"
But not where they cutt throtes full bagges to take
Yet Cossmus lent his hand with others (by),
To this light worke, which hang'd them heauily.
" Friscus doth daunce attendance on his puncke:"
But shee will make him caper when hee's sunke
" The blinde eates many a fly:" and that we proue
In honest men that honest women loue:
Then are such louers blinde, and eate a fly?
Most true, sith I those women did belye
" No Padd was in the straw" when as there lay
Kate with her Kitt all night (abrode) in hay;
But in the hay was Kate, but now no Padd,
For now the Lasse is marryed to the Ladd.
" All men do grease the fatt sowe in the taile:"
Thou liest grosse prouerbe, they fatt bawds do faile.
" Fast binde fast finde:" but Rufus bound as fast
As bonds could do to pay a debt he ought,
Stole quite away, ere quite the day was past;
And nowhere can be found though he be sought.
" Be as he may, no banning is:" and yet it is a curse,
To be as now it is, because the world was neuer worse.
" It is ill fishing still before the net:"
And thats the cause that I so little get,
I fish for all, yet seldome get I some,
Because some other catch all ere I come.
" Hunger still drops out of some noble nose:"
A bots dry vp that rhewme where ere it floes
" Baccare quoth Mortimer vnto his sowe:"
But wheres a Mortimer to say so now?
" Morus his manly wife, the breech doth weare:"
While other men (they say) do weare her geare.
All women haue no sonles: but spirits they haue:
To say who sales it, is a foole or knaue.
" Marcus is shau'n against the wool:" but dryly I suppose,
For of itselfe his haire fals off, and so falls off his nose
" To powre out oyle into the fire is not the way to quench it:"
O prouerbe (fy) thou art a lyer, as they can tell that wench it.
" Dogs barking aloofe bite not at hand:"
Yes (perhaps) should they forfeit their band
" It's true that all men say:" Then truly I
Make bookes, write faire; yet passe no bookes thereby
" Lambard was one of them that God bad ho:"
But t'was when he was hanging to and fro,
Whether I would not, I cannot the way:"
Then none hangs at Tiburne but some shewes the way.
" The neerer the Church, the further from God:"
Yea that is some Church that with Him is od.
" Desart and reward be euer farre od:"
With men so euer but neuer with God.
" Good ryding at two anchors:" some men do say:
But oft ryding at one is moer then they may.
" Some stumble ouer strawes and leape ouer blockes:"
Marry they are no dawes that leape to flye knockes,
" What some winne in the Hundred they loose in the Sheere:"
But some in the Hundred gets Sheeres well neere
" When thrifts in the towne, then some are in the field:"
But London doth few such cittizens yeeld.
" Some men to thriue are in the wrong box:
Yet there they are getting; for they get the pox.
" No penny, no Pater Noster" they say:
Yes the deuils without pence, many will pray
" A light lode is heauy to carry farre:"
Not being angells, for they flyers are.
" Oft things fall out in pudding time:"
But if they fell in, it were a crime.
" Short stooting looseth the set:"
And though they do, yet game they get
" The last at the pot is the first worth:"
Not if he finde there good store of broth
He hath pist on a nettle:" but would he had mist;
For a nettle hath stung him on which he hath pist.
" The flyes hannt leane horses:" those are French flies:
As for our English, they leane ones despise.
" Wee soone beleeue what wee desire:"
Then all beleeue they shall aspire.
" Ill newes are commonly true:"
Not if a lyer made them new.
" The more haste the worse speede:" (they say)
Not when we must take a snatch and away.
" By the fruit not the flowre, we know well the tree:
But we by the flowres know what gardens be
" With a little steele a little man's armd:"
If his heart be as little with lesse he is harmd.
" There needs no signe at the best wine:"
But sowre may it be growne,
Ere it be drunke vnknowne.
" Faire wordes breake no bones:" and yet the tongue doth:
Then if this be true its not true in both.
" This tongue breakes the bone, itselfe hauing none:"
But would mine might hould til tongues break them could.
" Euery groome is a king at home:"
Its an homely king that is but a groome.
" If men become sheepe the wolfe will deuoure them:"
But most become ban-dogs because they would scoure them.
" None plaies the foole well without wit:"
Then our Court fooles are fooles in earnest, not play they say
" Zeale without knowledge is sister of Folly:"
But though it be witlesse, men hold it most holly,
" The eat would eat fish, but for wetting her feete:"
To eat ere she wash is fowle and vnsweete.
" To speake ill of others, is the fift element:"
Nature needs but fowre; then the fift's an excrement
" Promise is euer the caue to give:"
But wee fast from promise to obserue the caue.
" The first chapter of fooles them selues magnifies:
Then the last is confusion, that makes the fooles wise
" Giuing is dead, and restoring is dying:"
Prouerbe th' are well both (you'l ne're leaue your lying):
For many do giue to lye with a drabb,
And still they restore the lye with a stabb.
" Fire and flax differ:" not to make fire,
Like men and women that burne in desire,
A bittar makes no good hawke:" and yet birds of prey
Call'd lemmons, are bitter, though golden and gay
" Fooles make the banquets, and wise men enioy them:"
So at Fooles wassells wise men destroy them.
" The end makes all equall:" Not so, not all;
For some then do climbe, and others do fall.
" Secrets are hidden:" yea so they ought
But beasts still shew them for a thing of nought.
" A scabb'd sheepe will marre a whole flock:"
Faith then the shep heerd's a knaue or a block
" Hee that will line in peace and rest,
Must heare and see and say the best:"
But if this rule were generall,
No preacher there should be at all.
" The taile doth often catch the fox:"
And by the taile some catch the pox,
" The posterne doore, makes theefe and whore:"
But were that damn'd with stone or clay,
Whoores and theeues would find a way.
" Good words anoint vs, and ill do vnioynt vs:"
But friends ill wordes the ioyntes do knit,
That flatters best words cause to flyt.
" Lyes haue short wings:" he lyes that so sings:
For farre do they flye when they be on their wings
" That tongue doth lye that speakes in hast:"
This some belyes that speake too fast.
" The Masters eye doth fatt the horse:"
Not if he haue no other course.
" It's better to giue the fieece then the sheepe:"
For some rotten bodyes, that drawes too deepe
" A Fooles paper is a white wall:"
But it was not so in Baltazars hall,
" All weapons of warre will not arme Feare:
But they are ynough to make Hope forbeare.
" Choose neither women nor lynnen by candle:"
Yes, in the dark, if them men may handle.
" Deedes are males, wordes female are:"
This makes women wordy ware
" Hatred with friends is succor to foes:
Then blessed were whoores if they succord those.
" Thus bitt the mare by the thumbe:" (quoth a setter)
But if he had said by the bum, it were better.
" Claw a churle by the taile and hee'l mute in thy fist:"
That's but by chance, he hath not still list.
" Hereafter comes not yet:" but were they one,
Many in Newgate would be hang'd to be gone.
" Some whores liue by losse; whose tongues runne at rouers:"
But they soone at butting, their losses recouers
" A queane hath euer a cloke for the rayne:"
Then one is richer then I know twaine.
" Neede makes the olde wife trot:" Nay she but wambles;
But for neede I am sure the yong one oft ambles
" All couet, all lose:" were this lye but small,
The world could not stand; for it couets all,
" It's sed that hungry flies bite sore:" Then Franck is such a flie;
For while the sting is in her taile, she bites most bitterly.
" He runneth farre that ne re returnes:" but since
Tiburne's so neere, some nere returne from thence.
" Something hath some sauor:" but some things there are,
Had they no sauor they were sweeter farre.
" Nothing venter, nothing haue:" but some do venture all
But in one bottom, till they sinck, and so they haue a fall.
" Nought hath no sauor:" that I deny:
For some are starke nought that smell most filthily
" He may sing before theeues that no mony brings:
But if before whoores they! sigh while he sings
" Some hold with the hare, and runae with the hound:"
But hardly with men such runners are found,
Phryne makes much but of her painted sheath:
And yet tis but the very gate of Death:
For all those blades that therein cleanly go,
Are soild, and spoild, the sheath is painted so
" As good to play as worke for nought" (they say)
But Players get much good by nought but play
Where be no receauers there will be no thoeues
But no Kings receauer this reckoning receauer
" The Vintner feares false measure:" How can bee
Feare that he hopes his maintenance shall bee?
" Ev'ry man for himselfe, and God for vs all:"
So, God should loue those whose loue is bat small
" Young saint, old deuill:" That still is not true;
For some were yong deuills that olde saints do grow.
" Some are in by the weeke:" and some by the tallow
Are farre further in than the best weeke can hollow
" Store is no sore:" Yes if they be scabs
Giuen by baksters, or gotten by drabbs.
" Throw no guift at the giuer againe:"
Yes; if he giue me a blow Ile thanke him with twaine
Lenea sees farre int a milstone:"
Nay she doth see into more then one.
" Once Flaccus was a flote:" (the world did see't)
But now he sinkes by floating in the Fleete
" A false knaue needs to brokers: but a broker
Needs a false knaue (a hangman or a hooker).
" A short horse is soone curried:" but some short mare,
Will haue more then the longest carrier can spare
" Of suffrance comes ease:" of such it is sedd,
That suffer at Tiburne vntill they be dead.
After skies lower we shall haue faire weather:
But women looke sower, then storme altogether
" Whores set vp a candle before the deuill:"
Th' are light in darknesse and yet lightly euill.
" To be merry and wise its good" (they say)
Then fooles that part can neuer play.
" Out of sight out of minde:" this lye they marke
That lye with their drabbs all night in the darke
" Who wedds ere hee is wise, nere thriues vntil he dyes:"
Then Mulus cannot thriue, to liue and yet to wiue.
" Proue thy friend e're thou neede:" that can we neuer;
For neede of a friend a man shall haue euer.
" Presse a worme on the taile and t'will turne againe:"
So will women (poore wormes) when need doth constraine.
" Saying and doing are two things:" but add,
It was not so when the world was made.
" In space comes grace:" but if out of rule
The gracer is either a whore, knaue, or foole.
" Neede hath no law:" but some great lawyers neede:
What, coyne? No: conscience in word and deede,
But if a lawyer lack hability,
Want's not so rightly called necessitie.
" Beggers shoold be no choosers:" then I muse
So many begg at Court that well may choose.
All shall bee well, and Iack shall haue Iill:"
Not I by this light,
For shee is too light.
" Soft fire sweete mault doth make:" then was that kill
That dryd Astolphus, badd, for he doth smell.
" Hast maketh waste:" but that makes to marre;
Yet better make haste from waste to runne farre
" It's better giue then take:" Not so;
For better giue then take a blow.
" Marcus his haire growes through his whood" they say;
That cannot bee; for all is fallen away,
" Light come, light goe:" Not so for Phryne came
To Marcus light; but goes opprest with shame
" God sends fooles fortune:" but yet not to all;
For some are great fooles, whose fortunes are small.
" The blinde should ludge no coulors: but they should;
For Homer to the life paint all things could.
" There goes the hare away:" this prouerb's poore;
Then make it rich, and say. " There rides the whore."
" What is a work-man without his tooles?"
Then the best furnisht work-men are but fooles.
" They hardly can runne that cannot goe:"
Some bound to a mast finde it not so
Some on the matter sett a good face:"
Yet they haue neither beauty, nor grace.
" I heare not on that side:" so may they depose,
Whose eares the Starr-chamber did light them to lose.
" The diuell is dead;" Nay that Ile ne're belecue;
For hee's nere dead while roring boyes do liue.
Againe
" The diuell is dead." Then haue the damned crew
Their maister lost, but they have found a new.
" On that stringe harpe no more;" (say angry boyes)
Yes; till a string the wagg strings quite destroyes.
" In loue is no lack" yes, lack of chinckes;
Loue lacks no woe that beggerly lincks,
" So many heads, so many witts:" Fy, fy:
It is a shame for prouerbs so so lye;
For I (though mine acquaintance be but small)
Know many heads that haue no witt at all.
Some fooles do say " at their wits end they are:"
When they were warn'd and yet would not beware;
So, when they were at th' entrance of their witt,
They were vpon the vtmost end of it,
" There are more maids then maulkin:" perhaps so:
And but perhapps neither, as now maids go
" Still sowes eat all the draff:" but some sowes still
With better things would faine their bellyes fill
" Betweene two stooles the taile to ground doth go;"
And oft one stoole doth it to water thro.
" Might orecomes right:" but oft a right knaue
Orecomes the mightiest a kingdome can haue.
Braue Harry late French King can say (beeing dead)
Rauillack his heart hitt as I the nailes head.
But God blesse our Ieamy from such right knaues
That might still may master Sathans right slaues.
" It's better bow then breake:" but stouping low
Olde Sisse did ripp; then ripp (olde Sisse) er'e bow
" Hee's a bench whistler:" that is but an ynche,
Whistling an hunts vp in the Kings Bench
" Sith light gaines purses make:" I fret
That mines so light and yet so little get,
" Still mumm is councell:" Nay tis no aduice;
But mummers keepe councell that winne with false dyce
" Some to hide faire faults can make faire weather:"
That's false; for so they were gods altogether
" Better at brim then at bottome to spare:"
But some spend at bottome till beggers they are,
" Euer spare and euer bare:" Prouerbe you fable;
For fooles still get most when they least spare their bable,
" Who that may not as they would will as they may:"
But themselues they may hang if their wills say not nay.
Lackies. " Out of God's blessing into the warme sunne:"
All boyes do goe that choose but to runne;
Vnlesse by their feete they be so well sped
That they (when they list) may runne to the head.
" They that are bound must needs obay:"
But some loose slaues to this say nay
" Even reckoning makes long friends:"
But some such reckoning much offends
" Misreckning's no paiment:" but by your leaue
That's all the paiment some (trusting) receaue.
" Change is no robbery:" No, that were strange,
For there were no robbery if there were no changen.
" To steale a goose and sticke a feather downe:
That is in vse, the wise such geese are growne.
" Phrme will haue an Oare in each mans boate:
While she sinks theirs that in her bottom floate.
" Men are oft marchants without money or ware:
But women much venture, yet are not so bare
" When wine is in then wit is out" (they say)
But when no wine is in, wits most away.
" Hee's high in the instep and very straite lac'd:"
That's but some leg with a straite buskin grac'd.
" Lenaea hath strooke the ball vnder line:
But she wan the game she plaid for, in fine;
Yet strake vnder lyne and vnder leg too,
So did as much as a woman could doo.
" Mare is of Court but not of Councell made:"
For Court hee's a coult but for councell a lade
" Hee may do much ill ere he can do much worse:"
That takes a poore poets papers, or purse
" To cast water in Thames is superfluous:"
Not at an ebbe when brewers it vse.
Classus of late " had his whore in the winde:"
That might soone bee if he had her behinde
" All's fish that comes to nett:" with some women;
Nay sure it's all flesh, and then they are women
" No end of his goods;" a late knight did kno:
Some lords are as rich, that will not say so.
" Who is worse shood then the shoomakers wife?
Faith, geese, that neuer ware shoes in their life.
" A scalld horse is good enough for a scab'd squire:
But not if that scabb paies well for the hire.
That epigram passeth all that I know
With which there is " But a word and a blow
" Scaturus still lookes vnto his wiues water:"
If shee bee a patient, then it's no matter,
" He winkes with one eye while the other doth glout:"
That may well bee; for, one eye is out
" Nought lay downe nought take vp:" Nay would the nought
But once take vp well they were as they ought;
But they take vp ill still when they Iye downe.
Which makes their bowles trill ill, and not hold their owne
" Some Iackes are common to all that will play:"
In their wiues' allies to hit as they may:
But if wiues be common their browes pay for it,
Because it is for the allies' benefit.
" Men call on the horse that will carry all:"
But some on such mares more often do call.
" Phryne may put her winnings in her eye
And see nere the worse:" Still prouerbs ye lye;
For she wonne the pox, which if she would set
In her best eye, the sight it would let.
" The world still he keepes at his staues end,
That neede not to borrow and neuer will lend:"
But if the world get within him, hee reeles
Vnder the world, that strikes vp his heeles.
Scarce haue some letchers " Scarburrow warning:
When they for god Cupid are martyrd by burning:
Then they were taken when zeale was too hott
And knowledge too cold, els burn'd they had not
" He that comes euery day shall haue a cocknay:"
And he that comes but now and then,
Shall haue a fatt hen;
But cocks that to hens come but now and then
Shall haue a cock-nay, not the fatt hen.
" Cailus is as furious as a lyon of Cotsold:
Why that makes his lionesse to make him a coock-old.
" Marina fryes in her own grease:" Nay soft, of that I doubt;
For Scaurus she bath shrowdly scorcht; so some she fries without.
" When bale's at the highest, then boote is nighest:
Yet when bale's askd of grand-lury men,
Of a poore prisoner, what booteth him then?
" Some make a great haruest of a little corne:
To make much of a little's no matter of scorne
" Hunger pierceth walls of stone:"
So it may yet meat haue none.
" The old mare would haue a new crupper:
That's vnder the taile but this should be vpper
" Phryne's as merry as a cricket" sometimes;
But angry as a waspe, when she reads my rimes
" Wishers and woulders are no good householder:
Yet the best householder many times wishes
He had better meanes to better his dishes
" Its good to haue an batch before the dore:
Then there's some good in the house of an whoore.
" Follow thou pleasure and still it will flee.
But flie thou pleasure and it will follow thee:"
Like some nice lasses that fly them that ply them,
But them still they follow that euer do fly them.
" The worse dogge that is waggeth his taile:"
Of that the worst women neuer do faile.
" Weigh iust and sell deere:" That whoores can nere;
Sith they are too light and sell still too deere
" Euery man drawes water to his mill;"
And so do all such women by their will.
" As good is my foe that hurts me not,
As my friend at my neede that helpes me not:
That foe doth wish (in his best mood)
Worse then that friend; then not so good.
" Loue lyes a bleeding:"
But not when hee's breeding.
" Euer the bigger eateth the beane:"
But they haue the worse when the cake's eate vp cleane.
Againe.
" Euer the bigger the beane doth eate:
But euer the lesser eates better meate.
" They say that faire words make fooles faine:
Then wise are fooles, for such wordes they gaine
" The wise man saies there's no accord
Where euery man would be a lord:"
That makes the lord so seldome fight,
Where euery man would be a knight.
" A foole oft puts his finger in a hote:"
So does the wise man when he plates the foole
" Many haue many blocks in their waies:"
If the blocks had heads they were little staies
" Sheepes flesh he loues well that dips his bread in the wool;"
Yet some dip it there whose stomacks are dull
" Before a crippl's ill halting still:"
If a man do it well, it is not so ill.
" One swallow" (they say) " no Sommer doth make:"
Some swallow (I say) till great heat they take.
" Many speak of Robin Hood that nere shot in his bowe:"
And so may archers do as good and pricke with shaftes as lowe.
Batchelers wiues and maids children, euer well are taught:"
Indeed so had they need to bee; for they are euer nought.
" Who can hold that will away:"
Seruants can, for they will stay.
" He beares no more ruie then a goose-turn in Theames:
Faith that's very much; for it troubles the streames.
" He that strikes with the sword, with the scabberd shall be strook:"
Thats the womanisht reuenge that euer man tooke.
" A mouse may in time bite in two a cable:"
That may she at once and if she be able
" When the fox doth preach, of your geese beware;
Yet once a Fox preacht that bloud did forbeare
" Her tongue runnes on pattens as the world does on wheeles:"
Then her tongue may at pleasure shew a faire paire of heeles.
" Hee must needes goe that the deuill doth driue:
Not if a stronger helpe him to striue.
" Raw leather will stretch:" twere better it would not;
Sith it's apt to stretch where (perhaps) it should not.
" They say things done vndone can nener be:"
But that's a lye, for bankeroupts we see.
" There was neuer faire prison, nor loue with fowle face:"
Yes faith but there bee oft both in one place.
" In vaine they rise early that vs'd to rise late:"
Better late then neuer to looke to thy state.
" It is better play with the eares then the tongue:
But some that must lose them thinke this is wrong.
" It's good still to hold the asse by the bridle:"
But he is an asse that still is so idle.
" The faire feathers still make the faire fowles:"
But some haue faire feathers that looke but like owles.
" The fire is neuer without heate:"
That some well know that ill do sweate.
" The friend that fainteth is a foe:"
Then is there no friend that I kno.
" The meale of the deuill turnes all to branne:"
Then hard fare his seruants yet he hath many a man
" Early it pricks that will be a thorne:"
Nay early it budds that will be a horne.
" The loy of the heart, fairly coulors the face:"
Nay some can do that when they are in worst case
" A spurred horse of force must trott:"
So must a mare that ambles not.
" Hee danceth well to whome Fortune pipes:
But they very ill she tabbers with stripes.
" A dead bee will make no hony:"
But from dead bees it's had for money.
" Good words and ill deedes deceaue wise and fooles:"
But ill deedes can neuer except men be mules.
" Ill goes the boate without the ore:"
And without rudder ill the whoore;
But if they haue both winde and tide
Full in their poopes, apace thei'l slide.
" Who sitts too well thinkes ill too oft:"
Nay all thinke best to sit aloft.
" Who vseth mee better then hee was vs'd,
By him I am or shall be abus'd:"
But with true louers that's vntrue,
Who eu'ry day giue fauors new
" Who suffers orecomes:" Nay that's but with some;
Some maides suffer men till they be ouercome.
" A barking mastiffe neuer bites:"
As soone as some still-bralling wights
" Who hath time and stales for it,
Often so, hee loseth it;"
But all haue time that are aliue
Yet few haue time aright to thriue
" Who doth euill hates the light:"
Light women some do loue by night.
" Who hath no children feedes them fatt:
Some coockholds are alone for that.
" Who serues the people nothing serues:"
So nothing he thereby deserues;
But best they serue that best do guard
That nothing; and carne best reward.
" Who sleepes with dogs shall wake with fleas:
But ladies doggs haue none of these.
Wi. Wall.
" Hard with the hard, ne're made good wall:"
Yet know I one (bardy) hardly will fall.
" Its merry in hall when beards wagg all:"
So thinke not some though oft their wiues (there) wagg.
About their businesse, but to fill their bagg.
" Wedding and hanging the Destinies dispatch:"
But hanging to some seemes the better match.
" Look ere thou leape:" but no good they reape
That are to be hang'd though they looke ere they leape.
" The hastic man neuer wants wo;"
To this they that flye a whore-house, say no.
" He is as rich as a new-shorne sheepe:"
So may hee bee fatt though his wooll be not deepe.
" He turned his tippet: but as I descerne
The tippet still turned the Turner Perne.
" A good tale ill told is marr'd in the telling:"
But the best tale well readd is a lye in the spelling,
As deepe drinkes the goose as the gander doth drinke:
Or els she were worse then a gander I think.
" Some men can neuer keepe the woolfe from the doore:"
Faith they are as idle as their strength and witt poore.
" Better meales many, then too merry one:"
Yet some are most merry when they cate alone
" I wott what I wott:"
Or els thou wottst not.
" Some kisse the child for the nurses sake:"
If they bee their owne wines they do not mistake.
" Some men thinke the moone's made of greene cheese:"
Nay if they thinke so those men are but geese
" Well, well" quoth some, " many wells many bucketts:"
Not so, for one Size may serue many sockets
" Its hard to make an olde dogg lye low:"
But an old bitch is made soone do so,
" Hvsbands be in beau'n whose wiues runne not ryott:"
I much doubt of that, they had (here) too much quiett
" Some do claw where it doth not ytch:"
They claw their elbow when they ytch in the brich
" Some coockolds cappes haue more case then their head:"
Sith hornes still are sencelesse where ere they are bred;
And yet some euckolds though their caps be of horne,
Their heads neuer ake, but highly are borne
" Hop whoore, pipe theefe, hangman lead the dance;"
Who euer doth lead it, he ends it perchance.
" Some iades there be take the bit in their teeth:
But more in their tailes ne're taken therewith.
" It's ill putting a weapon in a mad mans hands:"
But worse in our owne when anger commands
" It's ill healing an old sore:"
No: it is good if well paid therefore.
" No playing with a straw before an old cat:"
Yes; if one play as she doth with that.
" No cooke but lickes his own fingers, wee see;"
If they bee in some pyes he shall do it for mee
" Blacke will take no other hue:" but it will,
Or els some blacke women would not paynt so stil
" Some do amend when they cannot appaire:
But more do discend then to dispaire;
For wee haue had examples too new,
And more we shall haue, that this is too true.
Better is the last smile then the first laughter:"
But the last should be first had I a daughter
" Ill can they pipe that lacke their vpper lips:
But worse do they pipe that lack their nether lips
" God-fathers oft giue their blessings in a clout:
But it is so curst that little comes out
" As good an ynch as an all:" not so neither:
Though some for an ynch take ells altogether
" Do well and haue well:" neyther so still;
For some are good doers whose hauings are ill.
" Belceue wel and haue well:" with truth still this striues,
Some thinke they haue wel that haue whoores to their wiues
" A man cannot eat his cake and haue it still:
That may he, vnlesse his retention be ill
" What are workemen without tooles:"
Faith workemen still, though counted fooles;
Yet were they so they should be able,
To get their lyuing with their bable.
" No more can we hane of the fox but the skin:
Yes, bones to make dice, which now is no sin
" Who had that he hath not, would do that he doth not:"
Not so; for some haue no wit nor grace
And yet they do well and liue in good place
" Men faine would stop two gaps with one bush:
Those men proue but beasts if it be at a push.
" Ile recouer the horse or lose the saddle too:"
Do but couer a mare and that maist thou doo
" Who too much gripeth, the lesse he holdeth:"
Nay that's not so; for some do gripe so much
That all's their owne that they do once but touch.
Otherwise.
" Who too much embraceth still the lesse closeth:
But that is false; for some so much do close
With their embracing, that they nothing lose
" They may ill runne that cannot go:"
Yet some tongues (stutting) still do so,
" Svch beginning, such an end:" This Ilenot applaud,
For Luce did like a whore begin but ended like a baud.
" There be many more waies to the wood then one:
But (heere) it's false for our woods are al gone.
" En'ry winde blowes not downe the corne:"
But something as light haue it downe borne.
" It's ill casting pretious stones before swine:"
Yet some very sowes it makes very fine
" It went in at the one eare and out at the other:"
Then braines are still absent, when eares meete together.
" It is bad cloth that will take no coulor:"
But such a cloth ne're was scoured by fuller;
For if it be cloth some hue must ensue,
Vnlesse it be done: and yet that's an hue
" Hee sets cocke on the hoope in" you would say:
For cocking in hoopes is now all the play
And therefore no maruell mens stockes often droope.
That still vse the cocke pit to set cocke in hoope.
" Small pitchers haue wide eares: but so they may fall,
That their eares may be little or nothing at all
" Spend and God will send:" but wot ye what followes?
A staffe and wallet, the gaile or the gallowes.
" On the house top in anger, soone is a foole;"
But some in the seller their anger do coole.
" It's fond to spurne against the pricke;"
But many witty vse that trick.
" The one cannot pisse but the other must fart;
Then both are but beasts, as (Prouerb), thou art.
" The leg of a larke is worth two of a kite:"
That's sith the ones heauy, the other light;
Then if legs we weigh by lightnesse; in sence,
The leg of a puncke is meate for a prince.
" We shall haue larkes when the skie doth fall:
Then wee shall haue fire to roste them withall.
" Nough is impossible to a willing hart;"
Yes, many would but they cannot fart.
" Take all things as they come and bee content;"
So many whores do, and yet pay their rent
" Prouide for the worst, the best itselfe saues;"
Then must wee proulde best for whores and knaues
" Some take case in their inne:" how can they so,
When the pox goes with them whereuer they go?
" Hee laughs still that winnes" and yet this truth lies:
For Marc wonne the pox and yet still he cries
" Who haue many pease may put the more in the pott:"
Yet many haue so hut they put them not
" God nere sends mouthes but He sends meate;
Yea, if some knew where meat to get.
" When the pigg is profered hold ope thy poke:"
So bad women doe and to proffer prouoke.
Slouth breeds a scab: but some men by dooing,
Oft get a scabb that proues their vndoing,
" Early vp and nere the neere:"
It's false; for then some strike their deere
" Hot Joue is soone cold:" Then it's base desire,
Which oft is soone cooled by a quick fire
" The fatt's in the fire:" So may some say
That by firy serpents are burnt quite away
" An inch breaks no square:" but lesse of a dagger
In any man's throse would make him to swagger.
Againe.
" An inch breakes no square: but lesse in a dye,
Makes many so square that some flat do lye.
" An inch breakes no square:" but lesse many times,
Do make too long by a foote, many rimes
Where there is little, a small thing much easeth:"
Yet some that haue nothing a small thing displeaseth
" Hvnger makes hard beanes soft to appeare;"
But an horse thinks allwayes they are good cheere.
A prouerb doth say " that where sadles lack,
Better ryde on a padde then on the horse back:
But I say its better ride on the gallowes,
Then on the best padd, for the ill that followes.
" Let them that bee colde blow at the cole;"
" So may a man do and yet play the foole."
" Farewell vnkist:" That farwel's vnkinde;
And rather then so kisse, though behinde
" A beck's as good as a Dieu-guard:"
It neede to be so, it's a Noble's reward.
" A little pott's soone hott:"
Neuer when it warmeth not,
" If riches bring feare. gold's bought to deere:"
But would I had solde my hopes for that feare
" Who can sing so merry a note
As he that cannot change a grote:
Mary that can he that hath a voyce
T'alure to him the Angells choise.
" Poore poets heads are euer full of bees:"
But I ne're heard that hony came from these.
" Pouerty parts fellowship:" not euer so;
For it makes beggers together go
" All greene things are gay:" but I say nay;
For some wits are greene that are nothing gay.
" When the belly's full, bones most would rest:"
But full-bellyed women bones most molest.
" A friend's nere knowne till neede (in deede):"
But need's more knowne then friend at neede.
" All is not Gospell claw backs speakes;" and why?
For were it Gospell Gospell oft should lye.
" While the legg warmes the boote harmes; I, I;
But Ile warme my leggs and my bootes neuer fry
" Some thing hath some sauor:" faith, very small:
Nay a box on the care hath no smell at all
" Some tongues runnes before some wits too and fro:"
Those tongs are too swift, and those wits much to slowe
" The gray mare is oft the better horse:"
Ther's no coulor for that: then the better is worse
" In docke, out netle:" but nettles in dock
Oft nettle themselues, as sure as a rock.
" Too much of one thing is good for nought:"
That make some mens wiues slipp more then they ought.
" Three may keepe counsell if two be away:"
And so may all three if nothing they say.
" Forbearance is no quittance:" that's not so:
For some by forbearance are quit of a foe.
" Cuft catt's no good mouse hunt:" Thats but a fest;
For wiues that be wild-catts well cuft still do best.
" How can the foale amble when the horse doth trott?"
Yes, well; for by vse an amble is gott;
But Marcus the old colt by force of long vse,
(And comming from trotters) to trot cannot choose.
" Men should not presse much to spend much on fooles,
Away is fish cast that is east in dry pooles:
But if this be true, great men haue small wits;
For they must bestow on fooles and parasits
" The cat would haue fish but not wet her feete:"
But flesh she had rather if it she could meete.
" Hee that will thriue must aske leaue of his wife;"
That's true if he lackes an halter or knife;
I am not so cruell to wiues for all that:
But if husbands aske leaue, they be I wot what.
" Its hard to wiue and thriue in one yeare:"
Faith, the time is too cheape and the match is too deere
" Some losses haue eaten a stake to the end:"
Their bellies are so big that their backes will not bend
" Iacke would be a gentleman if he could speake French:"
The pox he would, hee's neerer it an ynch
" Phryne doth stand as sh had a flea in her eare:"
That's when she hath flead an other an other where.
" Some thinke their feete be where their head shall neener come:"
So thinkes the hangman when he hangeth vp some
" Some say it's merry, when knaues do meete:"
But not when they with blowes do greete.
" Some would faine flie but feathers they want:"
That is the fyre, the proud or ignorant
'Tis hard for one man all faults to amend:
But harder for women crackt in the end
Hee's liuelesse that's faultlesse: Prouerb ye lye:
For some there be liuelesse, stinke most wickedly
" That which is sent by Iohn Long the carrier;"
Makes him that lookes for't a passing longe tarrier
" Great boast and small rost:"
If it be so then farwell frost.
" A man shall as soone breake his necke as his fast
In a miser's house: Yet stay, make no hast
To condemine his fare-cost: for it is confest
That there is no cheare to a misers feast
Thought is free:" Yet if kings found
Thou thoughtst them ill thou shouldst be bound
" Phryne is often tane in a trip:
Yet often orethrowes ere she will slip
" Who medles with all things, the gosling may shoo:
Then goslings be shoed by geese that I know
Fvscus his old wife now lies alone,
When he lyes with her " he roasts but stone
Shee that worst may, doth the candle hold:"
Faith then she is too yong or too old.
Some cannot see the wood for trees: "
As well as lawyers lawes for fees.
" Some lasses lips hang in their light:
And yet their lips and hips are light
" Some wantons stand in their owne light:
Yet their lowe lying makes them light
" Fancy may boult bran till it be flower:"
But that will fat but fooles I am sure
" Loue me little, loue me long:"
But little loue great loue doth wrong
The deuills in the horolodge: I thinke so;
For the clockes lye faster (oft) then they go.
Otherwise
The deuil's in the horolodge: That's a lye sure
For then would his tongue lye lowd cur'y houre
" As merry as cup and can:" Drinke makes the dull:
But cannes are most sad when they are most full
" As merry as pies:" Maids are made by the cup:
When pies are most merry their tailes they turne vp.
" I trust the bore will no more so deepe wroote:"
Yes, if he meetes an eringo roote,
" She is as wise as Waltams calfe:"
Yet many sucke a bull till she leaues but halfe
" Fvrther then the wall we cannot goe:"
The priest that fell in went further then so.
A groning horse and grunting wife neuer failes their master:
Yes, if the master haue not life to ply them with the waster.
" Some wiues" (some say) " haue nine liues like a cat:"
If they scratch together the better for that
" It's a bad sacke will abide no clonting:"
Yet many a durt sacke abides none for powting.
They say that the lothe stake standeth most long
Then many most willing, are in the wrong
" The crowe thinkes her owne bird fairest in the wood:
Then thinkes she of that she ill vnderstood
" Change of pastures for calues do make:"
The prouerbes a calfe that so doth mistake;
For if they be bare and to much defilde,
By change from the calfe the fat's but exilde
" He that neuer climb'd neuer yet fell:"
Yes, from the dunghill, some fall to hell
" Let patience still in your garden appeare:
This lessons but women, still borne to beare
" Where nothing is the king his right doth lose
But he hath some subjects that are all or no nose;
Then a nose he quight loseth by the last of those
As he of the first may (at large) dispose.
" Shamefull crauing must haue shamefull nay:
Some shame not to deny ere the praiers pray
" It's good to beware by other mens harmes:"
Then neuer would soldier come neere hott alarmes
Marcus doth buy and sell mee: Then hee's madd;
For sure hee I lose, without more witt he had.
" Marcus" (they say) " doth tell tales out of schooles:
They are no tales; truth's told by babes and fooles.
Lvce beares fire in th' on hand and water in th' other:"
But in her chaffendish beares both together;
Shee's 'ambodexter, with both hands shee playes:
But yet with both leggs she workes nights and dayes
" Shees woone with an apple and lost with an nutt:"
Her bumme is no bilbo, and yet it will cutt
As keene as a razer that shaues away all.
And ne're vse sweete-water, nor yet barber's ball.
" Sharkus is shackled for want of a pleader:
And so he in Newgate is now a ring-leader.
Whores still are Clawbackes to knaues but for lack:"
Who stil claw their bellyes as they claw their backe:
But if they were both well clawd with a whipp
They would leaue their clawing; or clawe and then skippe.
" Better vnborne (they say) " then vntaught:"
Yet bawds teach to beare well, themsehies being nought.
" Bee it better, be it worse,
Do after him that beares the purse:"
Were this good aduice, then (as Iudas did)
Wee all should hang ourselues; which God forbid.
The great to the grindstone the small's nose do hold:
Then the small that are noseles, with them may be bold,
" Ioan in the darke is as good as my lady:"
Nay, perhapps better, such ladies there may bee.
" When all candles be out all catts be gray:"
This none but careless leachers will say.
Fowle waters good ynough t'extinguish fire:
Then fowle befall him that doth fowle desire.
" Still Cupid's arrowes neere the hart do stick"
But Venus still shootes neerest to the (Pin).
" At his owne bridall it's meete a man bee;"
Who wedds another's wife, how there is hee?
" The black oxe hath not trode on Phrinaes fine foote:"
Prouerb you lye, for I saw Phorbus doo't
" The end of our good beginneth our cuill:"
If so, the best lyuers still goe to the deuill
" Hee that sells lawne before he can fold it,
He shall repent him before he hath sold it:"
Nay diuers sell lawne that no folders be,
And sell it with ioy sith they tooke it to sea
" Some bargaine's deare bought and cheape should be sold:"
So many would sell their wiues if they could.
" Though they be of gold none loue their gyues:"
Yet many do loue golden whores to their wiues
" Better eles out then euer to ake:"
But yet were they out the paine would not slake:
For he in his head that hath ner" an eye
Oft eates many a fly though his wife bee by
" Who so bolde as blinde Bayard?" yes one that could see
Stole the weather-cocke of Paules, and yet lame was he
" I am cast at carts arse;" may they say that skyp
Away from the cart, to auoide the whipp.
" Hee that doth gape vntill he be fedd,
Well may he gape vntill he be dead:"
The reason is so many mouthes gape
For euery thing still, that nothing doth seape
" Faire Candida can neuer labour yonger:
For shee's in labour being thirteene vnder.
" A beare goes to the stake with more good will:"
Then some queanes goe to stake; yet wyn they still
" Cast an olde shooe after Luscus for luck:
That goes to his deere, her decrely to buck
" The rough nett is not best catcher of birds:"
No, nor the smooth best catching affoords.
" Of sufferance comes case:" yet some do endure
The pox all their liues, yet can get no cure.
" Two beads are euer better then one:"
But if they be wittles, as good there were none
" The weake hath the worst:" but not euer so;
For often weake women strong men ouerthrow
" The yong cock crowes as he the olde heares:"
And so sire and sonne alike still appeares:
So Sharke and his sonne this many a yeare
Are shutt vp for debt, and alike still appeare
" Some men still beare two faces in a whood:"
The whood is badd, or neither face is good
Prusus, and's wife, cuts their coate to their cloth:
Then the stuffe shrinkes shrewdly; for th' are naked both;
So know they by proofe, and that with good speede,
How ludicare came to their creede.
" It's ill begging a breech of a bare arst man;
Not so: for so are Caesars now and than.
" Vnbidden guests no where to sit can tell:"
O at Baintons, for an angell, excellent wel
" Olde Sharkus hath a meale-mouth" (as they say)
Then must his tongue knead dowe there night and day;
For it is alway working: yet still it
Makes no good cheat, for want of skill and wit
" A scab'd horse no combe abides:"
But a scab'd asse each soab still rides
" Heere is the dore and there is the way:"
A Tailer this will hardly say
" Lvke laughs in his sleeue:" and thereof he braggs;
That's easily seene, for he is all rags
" All's well that ends wel:" Then it is well
Peter was hang'd, that nere praid till he fell
" Tyde tarries no man:" But some are so tide
That still they must needes all commers abide
" Of a good beginning comes a good end:"
At end and beginning I may amend.
E PIG . 293.
O LDE Heywood, haue with thee, in His od Vaine ,
That yet with Booke sellers, as new, doth remaine.
New Poets sing riming but thy rymes aduance
Themselues in light measures, for thus they doe dance
He gather some Prouerbes thou gatherdst before,
To descant vpon them as thou didst of yore:
But yet not as thou didst for now that were sin,
But as my Muse prompteth, — and thus I begin.
" The good or the ill of all a mans life
Is the good or ill choice of his good or ill wife"
Prouerbiall rime thy reason I loue,
Yet may not thy reason with reason approue;
Sith there is more good and ill in this life
Then there is in choyce of good or ill wife
For soueraigne GOOD is heere to be found,
And the like EVILL: for both heere abound:
The first being life, the last being death,
Excells both the other aboue and beneath.
But of this life onely acknowledge I must
It is most vndoubted what thou hast discust:
And as my rimes iumpe in scanning thy sence,
So iumpe I with thee in iudgements expence.
" The Faire lasts all the yeare:" so Londons doth;
And yet most fowly lyes each house and booth;
Which fowly lye, to vent their marchandize:
Then better t'were it ly'de not as it lyes,
Or that an howre the Faire might fully end;
So should the Faire (though fowle) the lesse offend
" The weake goes to the wall:" Then Lesbia's fraile:
For still against the wall men run her
" Lalus the Iudge sets foote in Malus cause:
Thus with his foote the beast still handles lawes
" The blinde eates many a fly:" It's true indeede;
And so may Seers do for want of heede;
For he that writes the Bible in a nutt,
Hath married with a light and filthy slutt
" Little or nothing said soone mended is:"
But they that nothing do, do most amisse.
" Strike when the iron is hott:" Then Quintus, Ioe
Thy whore, — (that can, like iron, all heates endure)
Is now made hott; yet strike her not too low,
Least shee giue thee a clappe, thou cans't not cure
Phrina (hot whoore) " takes pepper in the nose"
Because her noses pimples some call poxes;
Wherewith she peppers both her friends and foes.
So makes her nose and poope, two pepper-boxes
" A faire threed, Captaine Porcupine hath spunne:
For he his threed of life hath quite vndone:
Call yee that spinning that vntwines that threed?
Then did he (hanging) spinne till he was dead.
O Hercules, what meanst thou so to spinne,
To loose the glory which thy fights did winne!
" Hee's Iacke out of office, that Iohn was in it:"
Then Iohns prouing Iacks, lacke honesty or wit;
But let me be Iohn till I be a Iacke:
If I loose my office let my necke cracke.
" It's better sit still then rise and fall:"
So tradesmen should not occupy at all
" Misrecking is no paiment" (it is said)
Yet some misreckon being truly paid:
For Dalia that a month hath not been wed,
Is ere the time she reckond, brought to bed
So then I hope it may be truly said
Though she misrecond she was truly paide.
" Still Fucus casts beyond the moone:" and why
The moone still casts him into Lunacy
" The greatest clarkes are not the wisest men:
Much lesse the least are: Who be wisest then?
For if wee meane clarks meanely wise esteeme,
Then wisest, who? the great that small do seeme
They say that " many hands light worke do make:"
But not where they cutt throtes full bagges to take
Yet Cossmus lent his hand with others (by),
To this light worke, which hang'd them heauily.
" Friscus doth daunce attendance on his puncke:"
But shee will make him caper when hee's sunke
" The blinde eates many a fly:" and that we proue
In honest men that honest women loue:
Then are such louers blinde, and eate a fly?
Most true, sith I those women did belye
" No Padd was in the straw" when as there lay
Kate with her Kitt all night (abrode) in hay;
But in the hay was Kate, but now no Padd,
For now the Lasse is marryed to the Ladd.
" All men do grease the fatt sowe in the taile:"
Thou liest grosse prouerbe, they fatt bawds do faile.
" Fast binde fast finde:" but Rufus bound as fast
As bonds could do to pay a debt he ought,
Stole quite away, ere quite the day was past;
And nowhere can be found though he be sought.
" Be as he may, no banning is:" and yet it is a curse,
To be as now it is, because the world was neuer worse.
" It is ill fishing still before the net:"
And thats the cause that I so little get,
I fish for all, yet seldome get I some,
Because some other catch all ere I come.
" Hunger still drops out of some noble nose:"
A bots dry vp that rhewme where ere it floes
" Baccare quoth Mortimer vnto his sowe:"
But wheres a Mortimer to say so now?
" Morus his manly wife, the breech doth weare:"
While other men (they say) do weare her geare.
All women haue no sonles: but spirits they haue:
To say who sales it, is a foole or knaue.
" Marcus is shau'n against the wool:" but dryly I suppose,
For of itselfe his haire fals off, and so falls off his nose
" To powre out oyle into the fire is not the way to quench it:"
O prouerbe (fy) thou art a lyer, as they can tell that wench it.
" Dogs barking aloofe bite not at hand:"
Yes (perhaps) should they forfeit their band
" It's true that all men say:" Then truly I
Make bookes, write faire; yet passe no bookes thereby
" Lambard was one of them that God bad ho:"
But t'was when he was hanging to and fro,
Whether I would not, I cannot the way:"
Then none hangs at Tiburne but some shewes the way.
" The neerer the Church, the further from God:"
Yea that is some Church that with Him is od.
" Desart and reward be euer farre od:"
With men so euer but neuer with God.
" Good ryding at two anchors:" some men do say:
But oft ryding at one is moer then they may.
" Some stumble ouer strawes and leape ouer blockes:"
Marry they are no dawes that leape to flye knockes,
" What some winne in the Hundred they loose in the Sheere:"
But some in the Hundred gets Sheeres well neere
" When thrifts in the towne, then some are in the field:"
But London doth few such cittizens yeeld.
" Some men to thriue are in the wrong box:
Yet there they are getting; for they get the pox.
" No penny, no Pater Noster" they say:
Yes the deuils without pence, many will pray
" A light lode is heauy to carry farre:"
Not being angells, for they flyers are.
" Oft things fall out in pudding time:"
But if they fell in, it were a crime.
" Short stooting looseth the set:"
And though they do, yet game they get
" The last at the pot is the first worth:"
Not if he finde there good store of broth
He hath pist on a nettle:" but would he had mist;
For a nettle hath stung him on which he hath pist.
" The flyes hannt leane horses:" those are French flies:
As for our English, they leane ones despise.
" Wee soone beleeue what wee desire:"
Then all beleeue they shall aspire.
" Ill newes are commonly true:"
Not if a lyer made them new.
" The more haste the worse speede:" (they say)
Not when we must take a snatch and away.
" By the fruit not the flowre, we know well the tree:
But we by the flowres know what gardens be
" With a little steele a little man's armd:"
If his heart be as little with lesse he is harmd.
" There needs no signe at the best wine:"
But sowre may it be growne,
Ere it be drunke vnknowne.
" Faire wordes breake no bones:" and yet the tongue doth:
Then if this be true its not true in both.
" This tongue breakes the bone, itselfe hauing none:"
But would mine might hould til tongues break them could.
" Euery groome is a king at home:"
Its an homely king that is but a groome.
" If men become sheepe the wolfe will deuoure them:"
But most become ban-dogs because they would scoure them.
" None plaies the foole well without wit:"
Then our Court fooles are fooles in earnest, not play they say
" Zeale without knowledge is sister of Folly:"
But though it be witlesse, men hold it most holly,
" The eat would eat fish, but for wetting her feete:"
To eat ere she wash is fowle and vnsweete.
" To speake ill of others, is the fift element:"
Nature needs but fowre; then the fift's an excrement
" Promise is euer the caue to give:"
But wee fast from promise to obserue the caue.
" The first chapter of fooles them selues magnifies:
Then the last is confusion, that makes the fooles wise
" Giuing is dead, and restoring is dying:"
Prouerbe th' are well both (you'l ne're leaue your lying):
For many do giue to lye with a drabb,
And still they restore the lye with a stabb.
" Fire and flax differ:" not to make fire,
Like men and women that burne in desire,
A bittar makes no good hawke:" and yet birds of prey
Call'd lemmons, are bitter, though golden and gay
" Fooles make the banquets, and wise men enioy them:"
So at Fooles wassells wise men destroy them.
" The end makes all equall:" Not so, not all;
For some then do climbe, and others do fall.
" Secrets are hidden:" yea so they ought
But beasts still shew them for a thing of nought.
" A scabb'd sheepe will marre a whole flock:"
Faith then the shep heerd's a knaue or a block
" Hee that will line in peace and rest,
Must heare and see and say the best:"
But if this rule were generall,
No preacher there should be at all.
" The taile doth often catch the fox:"
And by the taile some catch the pox,
" The posterne doore, makes theefe and whore:"
But were that damn'd with stone or clay,
Whoores and theeues would find a way.
" Good words anoint vs, and ill do vnioynt vs:"
But friends ill wordes the ioyntes do knit,
That flatters best words cause to flyt.
" Lyes haue short wings:" he lyes that so sings:
For farre do they flye when they be on their wings
" That tongue doth lye that speakes in hast:"
This some belyes that speake too fast.
" The Masters eye doth fatt the horse:"
Not if he haue no other course.
" It's better to giue the fieece then the sheepe:"
For some rotten bodyes, that drawes too deepe
" A Fooles paper is a white wall:"
But it was not so in Baltazars hall,
" All weapons of warre will not arme Feare:
But they are ynough to make Hope forbeare.
" Choose neither women nor lynnen by candle:"
Yes, in the dark, if them men may handle.
" Deedes are males, wordes female are:"
This makes women wordy ware
" Hatred with friends is succor to foes:
Then blessed were whoores if they succord those.
" Thus bitt the mare by the thumbe:" (quoth a setter)
But if he had said by the bum, it were better.
" Claw a churle by the taile and hee'l mute in thy fist:"
That's but by chance, he hath not still list.
" Hereafter comes not yet:" but were they one,
Many in Newgate would be hang'd to be gone.
" Some whores liue by losse; whose tongues runne at rouers:"
But they soone at butting, their losses recouers
" A queane hath euer a cloke for the rayne:"
Then one is richer then I know twaine.
" Neede makes the olde wife trot:" Nay she but wambles;
But for neede I am sure the yong one oft ambles
" All couet, all lose:" were this lye but small,
The world could not stand; for it couets all,
" It's sed that hungry flies bite sore:" Then Franck is such a flie;
For while the sting is in her taile, she bites most bitterly.
" He runneth farre that ne re returnes:" but since
Tiburne's so neere, some nere returne from thence.
" Something hath some sauor:" but some things there are,
Had they no sauor they were sweeter farre.
" Nothing venter, nothing haue:" but some do venture all
But in one bottom, till they sinck, and so they haue a fall.
" Nought hath no sauor:" that I deny:
For some are starke nought that smell most filthily
" He may sing before theeues that no mony brings:
But if before whoores they! sigh while he sings
" Some hold with the hare, and runae with the hound:"
But hardly with men such runners are found,
Phryne makes much but of her painted sheath:
And yet tis but the very gate of Death:
For all those blades that therein cleanly go,
Are soild, and spoild, the sheath is painted so
" As good to play as worke for nought" (they say)
But Players get much good by nought but play
Where be no receauers there will be no thoeues
But no Kings receauer this reckoning receauer
" The Vintner feares false measure:" How can bee
Feare that he hopes his maintenance shall bee?
" Ev'ry man for himselfe, and God for vs all:"
So, God should loue those whose loue is bat small
" Young saint, old deuill:" That still is not true;
For some were yong deuills that olde saints do grow.
" Some are in by the weeke:" and some by the tallow
Are farre further in than the best weeke can hollow
" Store is no sore:" Yes if they be scabs
Giuen by baksters, or gotten by drabbs.
" Throw no guift at the giuer againe:"
Yes; if he giue me a blow Ile thanke him with twaine
Lenea sees farre int a milstone:"
Nay she doth see into more then one.
" Once Flaccus was a flote:" (the world did see't)
But now he sinkes by floating in the Fleete
" A false knaue needs to brokers: but a broker
Needs a false knaue (a hangman or a hooker).
" A short horse is soone curried:" but some short mare,
Will haue more then the longest carrier can spare
" Of suffrance comes ease:" of such it is sedd,
That suffer at Tiburne vntill they be dead.
After skies lower we shall haue faire weather:
But women looke sower, then storme altogether
" Whores set vp a candle before the deuill:"
Th' are light in darknesse and yet lightly euill.
" To be merry and wise its good" (they say)
Then fooles that part can neuer play.
" Out of sight out of minde:" this lye they marke
That lye with their drabbs all night in the darke
" Who wedds ere hee is wise, nere thriues vntil he dyes:"
Then Mulus cannot thriue, to liue and yet to wiue.
" Proue thy friend e're thou neede:" that can we neuer;
For neede of a friend a man shall haue euer.
" Presse a worme on the taile and t'will turne againe:"
So will women (poore wormes) when need doth constraine.
" Saying and doing are two things:" but add,
It was not so when the world was made.
" In space comes grace:" but if out of rule
The gracer is either a whore, knaue, or foole.
" Neede hath no law:" but some great lawyers neede:
What, coyne? No: conscience in word and deede,
But if a lawyer lack hability,
Want's not so rightly called necessitie.
" Beggers shoold be no choosers:" then I muse
So many begg at Court that well may choose.
All shall bee well, and Iack shall haue Iill:"
Not I by this light,
For shee is too light.
" Soft fire sweete mault doth make:" then was that kill
That dryd Astolphus, badd, for he doth smell.
" Hast maketh waste:" but that makes to marre;
Yet better make haste from waste to runne farre
" It's better giue then take:" Not so;
For better giue then take a blow.
" Marcus his haire growes through his whood" they say;
That cannot bee; for all is fallen away,
" Light come, light goe:" Not so for Phryne came
To Marcus light; but goes opprest with shame
" God sends fooles fortune:" but yet not to all;
For some are great fooles, whose fortunes are small.
" The blinde should ludge no coulors: but they should;
For Homer to the life paint all things could.
" There goes the hare away:" this prouerb's poore;
Then make it rich, and say. " There rides the whore."
" What is a work-man without his tooles?"
Then the best furnisht work-men are but fooles.
" They hardly can runne that cannot goe:"
Some bound to a mast finde it not so
Some on the matter sett a good face:"
Yet they haue neither beauty, nor grace.
" I heare not on that side:" so may they depose,
Whose eares the Starr-chamber did light them to lose.
" The diuell is dead;" Nay that Ile ne're belecue;
For hee's nere dead while roring boyes do liue.
Againe
" The diuell is dead." Then haue the damned crew
Their maister lost, but they have found a new.
" On that stringe harpe no more;" (say angry boyes)
Yes; till a string the wagg strings quite destroyes.
" In loue is no lack" yes, lack of chinckes;
Loue lacks no woe that beggerly lincks,
" So many heads, so many witts:" Fy, fy:
It is a shame for prouerbs so so lye;
For I (though mine acquaintance be but small)
Know many heads that haue no witt at all.
Some fooles do say " at their wits end they are:"
When they were warn'd and yet would not beware;
So, when they were at th' entrance of their witt,
They were vpon the vtmost end of it,
" There are more maids then maulkin:" perhaps so:
And but perhapps neither, as now maids go
" Still sowes eat all the draff:" but some sowes still
With better things would faine their bellyes fill
" Betweene two stooles the taile to ground doth go;"
And oft one stoole doth it to water thro.
" Might orecomes right:" but oft a right knaue
Orecomes the mightiest a kingdome can haue.
Braue Harry late French King can say (beeing dead)
Rauillack his heart hitt as I the nailes head.
But God blesse our Ieamy from such right knaues
That might still may master Sathans right slaues.
" It's better bow then breake:" but stouping low
Olde Sisse did ripp; then ripp (olde Sisse) er'e bow
" Hee's a bench whistler:" that is but an ynche,
Whistling an hunts vp in the Kings Bench
" Sith light gaines purses make:" I fret
That mines so light and yet so little get,
" Still mumm is councell:" Nay tis no aduice;
But mummers keepe councell that winne with false dyce
" Some to hide faire faults can make faire weather:"
That's false; for so they were gods altogether
" Better at brim then at bottome to spare:"
But some spend at bottome till beggers they are,
" Euer spare and euer bare:" Prouerbe you fable;
For fooles still get most when they least spare their bable,
" Who that may not as they would will as they may:"
But themselues they may hang if their wills say not nay.
Lackies. " Out of God's blessing into the warme sunne:"
All boyes do goe that choose but to runne;
Vnlesse by their feete they be so well sped
That they (when they list) may runne to the head.
" They that are bound must needs obay:"
But some loose slaues to this say nay
" Even reckoning makes long friends:"
But some such reckoning much offends
" Misreckning's no paiment:" but by your leaue
That's all the paiment some (trusting) receaue.
" Change is no robbery:" No, that were strange,
For there were no robbery if there were no changen.
" To steale a goose and sticke a feather downe:
That is in vse, the wise such geese are growne.
" Phrme will haue an Oare in each mans boate:
While she sinks theirs that in her bottom floate.
" Men are oft marchants without money or ware:
But women much venture, yet are not so bare
" When wine is in then wit is out" (they say)
But when no wine is in, wits most away.
" Hee's high in the instep and very straite lac'd:"
That's but some leg with a straite buskin grac'd.
" Lenaea hath strooke the ball vnder line:
But she wan the game she plaid for, in fine;
Yet strake vnder lyne and vnder leg too,
So did as much as a woman could doo.
" Mare is of Court but not of Councell made:"
For Court hee's a coult but for councell a lade
" Hee may do much ill ere he can do much worse:"
That takes a poore poets papers, or purse
" To cast water in Thames is superfluous:"
Not at an ebbe when brewers it vse.
Classus of late " had his whore in the winde:"
That might soone bee if he had her behinde
" All's fish that comes to nett:" with some women;
Nay sure it's all flesh, and then they are women
" No end of his goods;" a late knight did kno:
Some lords are as rich, that will not say so.
" Who is worse shood then the shoomakers wife?
Faith, geese, that neuer ware shoes in their life.
" A scalld horse is good enough for a scab'd squire:
But not if that scabb paies well for the hire.
That epigram passeth all that I know
With which there is " But a word and a blow
" Scaturus still lookes vnto his wiues water:"
If shee bee a patient, then it's no matter,
" He winkes with one eye while the other doth glout:"
That may well bee; for, one eye is out
" Nought lay downe nought take vp:" Nay would the nought
But once take vp well they were as they ought;
But they take vp ill still when they Iye downe.
Which makes their bowles trill ill, and not hold their owne
" Some Iackes are common to all that will play:"
In their wiues' allies to hit as they may:
But if wiues be common their browes pay for it,
Because it is for the allies' benefit.
" Men call on the horse that will carry all:"
But some on such mares more often do call.
" Phryne may put her winnings in her eye
And see nere the worse:" Still prouerbs ye lye;
For she wonne the pox, which if she would set
In her best eye, the sight it would let.
" The world still he keepes at his staues end,
That neede not to borrow and neuer will lend:"
But if the world get within him, hee reeles
Vnder the world, that strikes vp his heeles.
Scarce haue some letchers " Scarburrow warning:
When they for god Cupid are martyrd by burning:
Then they were taken when zeale was too hott
And knowledge too cold, els burn'd they had not
" He that comes euery day shall haue a cocknay:"
And he that comes but now and then,
Shall haue a fatt hen;
But cocks that to hens come but now and then
Shall haue a cock-nay, not the fatt hen.
" Cailus is as furious as a lyon of Cotsold:
Why that makes his lionesse to make him a coock-old.
" Marina fryes in her own grease:" Nay soft, of that I doubt;
For Scaurus she bath shrowdly scorcht; so some she fries without.
" When bale's at the highest, then boote is nighest:
Yet when bale's askd of grand-lury men,
Of a poore prisoner, what booteth him then?
" Some make a great haruest of a little corne:
To make much of a little's no matter of scorne
" Hunger pierceth walls of stone:"
So it may yet meat haue none.
" The old mare would haue a new crupper:
That's vnder the taile but this should be vpper
" Phryne's as merry as a cricket" sometimes;
But angry as a waspe, when she reads my rimes
" Wishers and woulders are no good householder:
Yet the best householder many times wishes
He had better meanes to better his dishes
" Its good to haue an batch before the dore:
Then there's some good in the house of an whoore.
" Follow thou pleasure and still it will flee.
But flie thou pleasure and it will follow thee:"
Like some nice lasses that fly them that ply them,
But them still they follow that euer do fly them.
" The worse dogge that is waggeth his taile:"
Of that the worst women neuer do faile.
" Weigh iust and sell deere:" That whoores can nere;
Sith they are too light and sell still too deere
" Euery man drawes water to his mill;"
And so do all such women by their will.
" As good is my foe that hurts me not,
As my friend at my neede that helpes me not:
That foe doth wish (in his best mood)
Worse then that friend; then not so good.
" Loue lyes a bleeding:"
But not when hee's breeding.
" Euer the bigger eateth the beane:"
But they haue the worse when the cake's eate vp cleane.
Againe.
" Euer the bigger the beane doth eate:
But euer the lesser eates better meate.
" They say that faire words make fooles faine:
Then wise are fooles, for such wordes they gaine
" The wise man saies there's no accord
Where euery man would be a lord:"
That makes the lord so seldome fight,
Where euery man would be a knight.
" A foole oft puts his finger in a hote:"
So does the wise man when he plates the foole
" Many haue many blocks in their waies:"
If the blocks had heads they were little staies
" Sheepes flesh he loues well that dips his bread in the wool;"
Yet some dip it there whose stomacks are dull
" Before a crippl's ill halting still:"
If a man do it well, it is not so ill.
" One swallow" (they say) " no Sommer doth make:"
Some swallow (I say) till great heat they take.
" Many speak of Robin Hood that nere shot in his bowe:"
And so may archers do as good and pricke with shaftes as lowe.
Batchelers wiues and maids children, euer well are taught:"
Indeed so had they need to bee; for they are euer nought.
" Who can hold that will away:"
Seruants can, for they will stay.
" He beares no more ruie then a goose-turn in Theames:
Faith that's very much; for it troubles the streames.
" He that strikes with the sword, with the scabberd shall be strook:"
Thats the womanisht reuenge that euer man tooke.
" A mouse may in time bite in two a cable:"
That may she at once and if she be able
" When the fox doth preach, of your geese beware;
Yet once a Fox preacht that bloud did forbeare
" Her tongue runnes on pattens as the world does on wheeles:"
Then her tongue may at pleasure shew a faire paire of heeles.
" Hee must needes goe that the deuill doth driue:
Not if a stronger helpe him to striue.
" Raw leather will stretch:" twere better it would not;
Sith it's apt to stretch where (perhaps) it should not.
" They say things done vndone can nener be:"
But that's a lye, for bankeroupts we see.
" There was neuer faire prison, nor loue with fowle face:"
Yes faith but there bee oft both in one place.
" In vaine they rise early that vs'd to rise late:"
Better late then neuer to looke to thy state.
" It is better play with the eares then the tongue:
But some that must lose them thinke this is wrong.
" It's good still to hold the asse by the bridle:"
But he is an asse that still is so idle.
" The faire feathers still make the faire fowles:"
But some haue faire feathers that looke but like owles.
" The fire is neuer without heate:"
That some well know that ill do sweate.
" The friend that fainteth is a foe:"
Then is there no friend that I kno.
" The meale of the deuill turnes all to branne:"
Then hard fare his seruants yet he hath many a man
" Early it pricks that will be a thorne:"
Nay early it budds that will be a horne.
" The loy of the heart, fairly coulors the face:"
Nay some can do that when they are in worst case
" A spurred horse of force must trott:"
So must a mare that ambles not.
" Hee danceth well to whome Fortune pipes:
But they very ill she tabbers with stripes.
" A dead bee will make no hony:"
But from dead bees it's had for money.
" Good words and ill deedes deceaue wise and fooles:"
But ill deedes can neuer except men be mules.
" Ill goes the boate without the ore:"
And without rudder ill the whoore;
But if they haue both winde and tide
Full in their poopes, apace thei'l slide.
" Who sitts too well thinkes ill too oft:"
Nay all thinke best to sit aloft.
" Who vseth mee better then hee was vs'd,
By him I am or shall be abus'd:"
But with true louers that's vntrue,
Who eu'ry day giue fauors new
" Who suffers orecomes:" Nay that's but with some;
Some maides suffer men till they be ouercome.
" A barking mastiffe neuer bites:"
As soone as some still-bralling wights
" Who hath time and stales for it,
Often so, hee loseth it;"
But all haue time that are aliue
Yet few haue time aright to thriue
" Who doth euill hates the light:"
Light women some do loue by night.
" Who hath no children feedes them fatt:
Some coockholds are alone for that.
" Who serues the people nothing serues:"
So nothing he thereby deserues;
But best they serue that best do guard
That nothing; and carne best reward.
" Who sleepes with dogs shall wake with fleas:
But ladies doggs haue none of these.
Wi. Wall.
" Hard with the hard, ne're made good wall:"
Yet know I one (bardy) hardly will fall.
" Its merry in hall when beards wagg all:"
So thinke not some though oft their wiues (there) wagg.
About their businesse, but to fill their bagg.
" Wedding and hanging the Destinies dispatch:"
But hanging to some seemes the better match.
" Look ere thou leape:" but no good they reape
That are to be hang'd though they looke ere they leape.
" The hastic man neuer wants wo;"
To this they that flye a whore-house, say no.
" He is as rich as a new-shorne sheepe:"
So may hee bee fatt though his wooll be not deepe.
" He turned his tippet: but as I descerne
The tippet still turned the Turner Perne.
" A good tale ill told is marr'd in the telling:"
But the best tale well readd is a lye in the spelling,
As deepe drinkes the goose as the gander doth drinke:
Or els she were worse then a gander I think.
" Some men can neuer keepe the woolfe from the doore:"
Faith they are as idle as their strength and witt poore.
" Better meales many, then too merry one:"
Yet some are most merry when they cate alone
" I wott what I wott:"
Or els thou wottst not.
" Some kisse the child for the nurses sake:"
If they bee their owne wines they do not mistake.
" Some men thinke the moone's made of greene cheese:"
Nay if they thinke so those men are but geese
" Well, well" quoth some, " many wells many bucketts:"
Not so, for one Size may serue many sockets
" Its hard to make an olde dogg lye low:"
But an old bitch is made soone do so,
" Hvsbands be in beau'n whose wiues runne not ryott:"
I much doubt of that, they had (here) too much quiett
" Some do claw where it doth not ytch:"
They claw their elbow when they ytch in the brich
" Some coockolds cappes haue more case then their head:"
Sith hornes still are sencelesse where ere they are bred;
And yet some euckolds though their caps be of horne,
Their heads neuer ake, but highly are borne
" Hop whoore, pipe theefe, hangman lead the dance;"
Who euer doth lead it, he ends it perchance.
" Some iades there be take the bit in their teeth:
But more in their tailes ne're taken therewith.
" It's ill putting a weapon in a mad mans hands:"
But worse in our owne when anger commands
" It's ill healing an old sore:"
No: it is good if well paid therefore.
" No playing with a straw before an old cat:"
Yes; if one play as she doth with that.
" No cooke but lickes his own fingers, wee see;"
If they bee in some pyes he shall do it for mee
" Blacke will take no other hue:" but it will,
Or els some blacke women would not paynt so stil
" Some do amend when they cannot appaire:
But more do discend then to dispaire;
For wee haue had examples too new,
And more we shall haue, that this is too true.
Better is the last smile then the first laughter:"
But the last should be first had I a daughter
" Ill can they pipe that lacke their vpper lips:
But worse do they pipe that lack their nether lips
" God-fathers oft giue their blessings in a clout:
But it is so curst that little comes out
" As good an ynch as an all:" not so neither:
Though some for an ynch take ells altogether
" Do well and haue well:" neyther so still;
For some are good doers whose hauings are ill.
" Belceue wel and haue well:" with truth still this striues,
Some thinke they haue wel that haue whoores to their wiues
" A man cannot eat his cake and haue it still:
That may he, vnlesse his retention be ill
" What are workemen without tooles:"
Faith workemen still, though counted fooles;
Yet were they so they should be able,
To get their lyuing with their bable.
" No more can we hane of the fox but the skin:
Yes, bones to make dice, which now is no sin
" Who had that he hath not, would do that he doth not:"
Not so; for some haue no wit nor grace
And yet they do well and liue in good place
" Men faine would stop two gaps with one bush:
Those men proue but beasts if it be at a push.
" Ile recouer the horse or lose the saddle too:"
Do but couer a mare and that maist thou doo
" Who too much gripeth, the lesse he holdeth:"
Nay that's not so; for some do gripe so much
That all's their owne that they do once but touch.
Otherwise.
" Who too much embraceth still the lesse closeth:
But that is false; for some so much do close
With their embracing, that they nothing lose
" They may ill runne that cannot go:"
Yet some tongues (stutting) still do so,
" Svch beginning, such an end:" This Ilenot applaud,
For Luce did like a whore begin but ended like a baud.
" There be many more waies to the wood then one:
But (heere) it's false for our woods are al gone.
" En'ry winde blowes not downe the corne:"
But something as light haue it downe borne.
" It's ill casting pretious stones before swine:"
Yet some very sowes it makes very fine
" It went in at the one eare and out at the other:"
Then braines are still absent, when eares meete together.
" It is bad cloth that will take no coulor:"
But such a cloth ne're was scoured by fuller;
For if it be cloth some hue must ensue,
Vnlesse it be done: and yet that's an hue
" Hee sets cocke on the hoope in" you would say:
For cocking in hoopes is now all the play
And therefore no maruell mens stockes often droope.
That still vse the cocke pit to set cocke in hoope.
" Small pitchers haue wide eares: but so they may fall,
That their eares may be little or nothing at all
" Spend and God will send:" but wot ye what followes?
A staffe and wallet, the gaile or the gallowes.
" On the house top in anger, soone is a foole;"
But some in the seller their anger do coole.
" It's fond to spurne against the pricke;"
But many witty vse that trick.
" The one cannot pisse but the other must fart;
Then both are but beasts, as (Prouerb), thou art.
" The leg of a larke is worth two of a kite:"
That's sith the ones heauy, the other light;
Then if legs we weigh by lightnesse; in sence,
The leg of a puncke is meate for a prince.
" We shall haue larkes when the skie doth fall:
Then wee shall haue fire to roste them withall.
" Nough is impossible to a willing hart;"
Yes, many would but they cannot fart.
" Take all things as they come and bee content;"
So many whores do, and yet pay their rent
" Prouide for the worst, the best itselfe saues;"
Then must wee proulde best for whores and knaues
" Some take case in their inne:" how can they so,
When the pox goes with them whereuer they go?
" Hee laughs still that winnes" and yet this truth lies:
For Marc wonne the pox and yet still he cries
" Who haue many pease may put the more in the pott:"
Yet many haue so hut they put them not
" God nere sends mouthes but He sends meate;
Yea, if some knew where meat to get.
" When the pigg is profered hold ope thy poke:"
So bad women doe and to proffer prouoke.
Slouth breeds a scab: but some men by dooing,
Oft get a scabb that proues their vndoing,
" Early vp and nere the neere:"
It's false; for then some strike their deere
" Hot Joue is soone cold:" Then it's base desire,
Which oft is soone cooled by a quick fire
" The fatt's in the fire:" So may some say
That by firy serpents are burnt quite away
" An inch breaks no square:" but lesse of a dagger
In any man's throse would make him to swagger.
Againe.
" An inch breakes no square: but lesse in a dye,
Makes many so square that some flat do lye.
" An inch breakes no square:" but lesse many times,
Do make too long by a foote, many rimes
Where there is little, a small thing much easeth:"
Yet some that haue nothing a small thing displeaseth
" Hvnger makes hard beanes soft to appeare;"
But an horse thinks allwayes they are good cheere.
A prouerb doth say " that where sadles lack,
Better ryde on a padde then on the horse back:
But I say its better ride on the gallowes,
Then on the best padd, for the ill that followes.
" Let them that bee colde blow at the cole;"
" So may a man do and yet play the foole."
" Farewell vnkist:" That farwel's vnkinde;
And rather then so kisse, though behinde
" A beck's as good as a Dieu-guard:"
It neede to be so, it's a Noble's reward.
" A little pott's soone hott:"
Neuer when it warmeth not,
" If riches bring feare. gold's bought to deere:"
But would I had solde my hopes for that feare
" Who can sing so merry a note
As he that cannot change a grote:
Mary that can he that hath a voyce
T'alure to him the Angells choise.
" Poore poets heads are euer full of bees:"
But I ne're heard that hony came from these.
" Pouerty parts fellowship:" not euer so;
For it makes beggers together go
" All greene things are gay:" but I say nay;
For some wits are greene that are nothing gay.
" When the belly's full, bones most would rest:"
But full-bellyed women bones most molest.
" A friend's nere knowne till neede (in deede):"
But need's more knowne then friend at neede.
" All is not Gospell claw backs speakes;" and why?
For were it Gospell Gospell oft should lye.
" While the legg warmes the boote harmes; I, I;
But Ile warme my leggs and my bootes neuer fry
" Some thing hath some sauor:" faith, very small:
Nay a box on the care hath no smell at all
" Some tongues runnes before some wits too and fro:"
Those tongs are too swift, and those wits much to slowe
" The gray mare is oft the better horse:"
Ther's no coulor for that: then the better is worse
" In docke, out netle:" but nettles in dock
Oft nettle themselues, as sure as a rock.
" Too much of one thing is good for nought:"
That make some mens wiues slipp more then they ought.
" Three may keepe counsell if two be away:"
And so may all three if nothing they say.
" Forbearance is no quittance:" that's not so:
For some by forbearance are quit of a foe.
" Cuft catt's no good mouse hunt:" Thats but a fest;
For wiues that be wild-catts well cuft still do best.
" How can the foale amble when the horse doth trott?"
Yes, well; for by vse an amble is gott;
But Marcus the old colt by force of long vse,
(And comming from trotters) to trot cannot choose.
" Men should not presse much to spend much on fooles,
Away is fish cast that is east in dry pooles:
But if this be true, great men haue small wits;
For they must bestow on fooles and parasits
" The cat would haue fish but not wet her feete:"
But flesh she had rather if it she could meete.
" Hee that will thriue must aske leaue of his wife;"
That's true if he lackes an halter or knife;
I am not so cruell to wiues for all that:
But if husbands aske leaue, they be I wot what.
" Its hard to wiue and thriue in one yeare:"
Faith, the time is too cheape and the match is too deere
" Some losses haue eaten a stake to the end:"
Their bellies are so big that their backes will not bend
" Iacke would be a gentleman if he could speake French:"
The pox he would, hee's neerer it an ynch
" Phryne doth stand as sh had a flea in her eare:"
That's when she hath flead an other an other where.
" Some thinke their feete be where their head shall neener come:"
So thinkes the hangman when he hangeth vp some
" Some say it's merry, when knaues do meete:"
But not when they with blowes do greete.
" Some would faine flie but feathers they want:"
That is the fyre, the proud or ignorant
'Tis hard for one man all faults to amend:
But harder for women crackt in the end
Hee's liuelesse that's faultlesse: Prouerb ye lye:
For some there be liuelesse, stinke most wickedly
" That which is sent by Iohn Long the carrier;"
Makes him that lookes for't a passing longe tarrier
" Great boast and small rost:"
If it be so then farwell frost.
" A man shall as soone breake his necke as his fast
In a miser's house: Yet stay, make no hast
To condemine his fare-cost: for it is confest
That there is no cheare to a misers feast
Thought is free:" Yet if kings found
Thou thoughtst them ill thou shouldst be bound
" Phryne is often tane in a trip:
Yet often orethrowes ere she will slip
" Who medles with all things, the gosling may shoo:
Then goslings be shoed by geese that I know
Fvscus his old wife now lies alone,
When he lyes with her " he roasts but stone
Shee that worst may, doth the candle hold:"
Faith then she is too yong or too old.
Some cannot see the wood for trees: "
As well as lawyers lawes for fees.
" Some lasses lips hang in their light:
And yet their lips and hips are light
" Some wantons stand in their owne light:
Yet their lowe lying makes them light
" Fancy may boult bran till it be flower:"
But that will fat but fooles I am sure
" Loue me little, loue me long:"
But little loue great loue doth wrong
The deuills in the horolodge: I thinke so;
For the clockes lye faster (oft) then they go.
Otherwise
The deuil's in the horolodge: That's a lye sure
For then would his tongue lye lowd cur'y houre
" As merry as cup and can:" Drinke makes the dull:
But cannes are most sad when they are most full
" As merry as pies:" Maids are made by the cup:
When pies are most merry their tailes they turne vp.
" I trust the bore will no more so deepe wroote:"
Yes, if he meetes an eringo roote,
" She is as wise as Waltams calfe:"
Yet many sucke a bull till she leaues but halfe
" Fvrther then the wall we cannot goe:"
The priest that fell in went further then so.
A groning horse and grunting wife neuer failes their master:
Yes, if the master haue not life to ply them with the waster.
" Some wiues" (some say) " haue nine liues like a cat:"
If they scratch together the better for that
" It's a bad sacke will abide no clonting:"
Yet many a durt sacke abides none for powting.
They say that the lothe stake standeth most long
Then many most willing, are in the wrong
" The crowe thinkes her owne bird fairest in the wood:
Then thinkes she of that she ill vnderstood
" Change of pastures for calues do make:"
The prouerbes a calfe that so doth mistake;
For if they be bare and to much defilde,
By change from the calfe the fat's but exilde
" He that neuer climb'd neuer yet fell:"
Yes, from the dunghill, some fall to hell
" Let patience still in your garden appeare:
This lessons but women, still borne to beare
" Where nothing is the king his right doth lose
But he hath some subjects that are all or no nose;
Then a nose he quight loseth by the last of those
As he of the first may (at large) dispose.
" Shamefull crauing must haue shamefull nay:
Some shame not to deny ere the praiers pray
" It's good to beware by other mens harmes:"
Then neuer would soldier come neere hott alarmes
Marcus doth buy and sell mee: Then hee's madd;
For sure hee I lose, without more witt he had.
" Marcus" (they say) " doth tell tales out of schooles:
They are no tales; truth's told by babes and fooles.
Lvce beares fire in th' on hand and water in th' other:"
But in her chaffendish beares both together;
Shee's 'ambodexter, with both hands shee playes:
But yet with both leggs she workes nights and dayes
" Shees woone with an apple and lost with an nutt:"
Her bumme is no bilbo, and yet it will cutt
As keene as a razer that shaues away all.
And ne're vse sweete-water, nor yet barber's ball.
" Sharkus is shackled for want of a pleader:
And so he in Newgate is now a ring-leader.
Whores still are Clawbackes to knaues but for lack:"
Who stil claw their bellyes as they claw their backe:
But if they were both well clawd with a whipp
They would leaue their clawing; or clawe and then skippe.
" Better vnborne (they say) " then vntaught:"
Yet bawds teach to beare well, themsehies being nought.
" Bee it better, be it worse,
Do after him that beares the purse:"
Were this good aduice, then (as Iudas did)
Wee all should hang ourselues; which God forbid.
The great to the grindstone the small's nose do hold:
Then the small that are noseles, with them may be bold,
" Ioan in the darke is as good as my lady:"
Nay, perhapps better, such ladies there may bee.
" When all candles be out all catts be gray:"
This none but careless leachers will say.
Fowle waters good ynough t'extinguish fire:
Then fowle befall him that doth fowle desire.
" Still Cupid's arrowes neere the hart do stick"
But Venus still shootes neerest to the (Pin).
" At his owne bridall it's meete a man bee;"
Who wedds another's wife, how there is hee?
" The black oxe hath not trode on Phrinaes fine foote:"
Prouerb you lye, for I saw Phorbus doo't
" The end of our good beginneth our cuill:"
If so, the best lyuers still goe to the deuill
" Hee that sells lawne before he can fold it,
He shall repent him before he hath sold it:"
Nay diuers sell lawne that no folders be,
And sell it with ioy sith they tooke it to sea
" Some bargaine's deare bought and cheape should be sold:"
So many would sell their wiues if they could.
" Though they be of gold none loue their gyues:"
Yet many do loue golden whores to their wiues
" Better eles out then euer to ake:"
But yet were they out the paine would not slake:
For he in his head that hath ner" an eye
Oft eates many a fly though his wife bee by
" Who so bolde as blinde Bayard?" yes one that could see
Stole the weather-cocke of Paules, and yet lame was he
" I am cast at carts arse;" may they say that skyp
Away from the cart, to auoide the whipp.
" Hee that doth gape vntill he be fedd,
Well may he gape vntill he be dead:"
The reason is so many mouthes gape
For euery thing still, that nothing doth seape
" Faire Candida can neuer labour yonger:
For shee's in labour being thirteene vnder.
" A beare goes to the stake with more good will:"
Then some queanes goe to stake; yet wyn they still
" Cast an olde shooe after Luscus for luck:
That goes to his deere, her decrely to buck
" The rough nett is not best catcher of birds:"
No, nor the smooth best catching affoords.
" Of sufferance comes case:" yet some do endure
The pox all their liues, yet can get no cure.
" Two beads are euer better then one:"
But if they be wittles, as good there were none
" The weake hath the worst:" but not euer so;
For often weake women strong men ouerthrow
" The yong cock crowes as he the olde heares:"
And so sire and sonne alike still appeares:
So Sharke and his sonne this many a yeare
Are shutt vp for debt, and alike still appeare
" Some men still beare two faces in a whood:"
The whood is badd, or neither face is good
Prusus, and's wife, cuts their coate to their cloth:
Then the stuffe shrinkes shrewdly; for th' are naked both;
So know they by proofe, and that with good speede,
How ludicare came to their creede.
" It's ill begging a breech of a bare arst man;
Not so: for so are Caesars now and than.
" Vnbidden guests no where to sit can tell:"
O at Baintons, for an angell, excellent wel
" Olde Sharkus hath a meale-mouth" (as they say)
Then must his tongue knead dowe there night and day;
For it is alway working: yet still it
Makes no good cheat, for want of skill and wit
" A scab'd horse no combe abides:"
But a scab'd asse each soab still rides
" Heere is the dore and there is the way:"
A Tailer this will hardly say
" Lvke laughs in his sleeue:" and thereof he braggs;
That's easily seene, for he is all rags
" All's well that ends wel:" Then it is well
Peter was hang'd, that nere praid till he fell
" Tyde tarries no man:" But some are so tide
That still they must needes all commers abide
" Of a good beginning comes a good end:"
At end and beginning I may amend.
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