in return for a song he made in the interests of his friend

Fair-haired Donald MacNaughton,
in thy person ill nature prevaileth;
thou wilt not practise virtue
until thou diest to sin.
Pity a place wherein turned up
the ruthless scapegrace, who foully
made that scathing onslaught on us,
made that, etc.

Thou, who didst start to make verses,
wast foolish, in thy presumption,
to point them in my direction,
when I neither requested nor asked thee;
thou didst spout falsehood and scoffing,
and, whether or not thou dost like it,
I trust thou wilt have thy full meed,
I trust, etc.

Well known to me were thy habits;
thou art rude and sarcastic,
and thy tongue is like a razor
for thinness and sharpness —
thou gavest myself a bout of it;
since 'tis thou who art in the wrong,
why should I not requite thee for thy tale,
why should I, etc.?

Thou art the rotten tree, withered,
full of decay and microbes,
grown scraggy and stunted,
short, hump-backed, distorted;
a stump bound for the embers art thou,
who didst deserve to be burned as sacrifice:
thou hast grossly neglected the gospel,
thou hast, etc.

Little the loss had it happened
on the day thou framedst the words,
that two pounds and a quarter
of hard, blasting powder
had been rammed in thy belly
and thou wert split by a fusee,
to become a lifeless carcase,
to become, etc.

Thou art a useless, tough scrag:
supposing thou wert in a moss hag,
while dogs and ravens did rend thee,
they would not have their fill of food;
oft art thou hard by the embers,
thy shanks to thy pelvis grew mottled,
and on thy thighs the fire flush is intense,
and on thy thighs, etc.

As thou art not a competent tailor,
the others have ostracised thee;
thou art for ever in corners,
repairing the cast-off garments,
thou art an appliance for patches:
oft didst thou sit in the ashes,
whilst I was stalking the antlered stag,
whilst I, etc.

Thus is thy portrait described:
a wisp-haired, sour-visaged fellow,
without bonnet or periwig,
without top-knot or forelock —
being plucked wholly bare;
thou art scabbed down to thy elbow,
with a woeful wale of itch round thy hips,
with a woeful, etc.

Numerous were the places
where the tailor MacNaughton turned up,
both in Scotland and in England,
in market towns and lowlands,
and oft hast thou hunted the trollops;
as thou hast not died of a pox,
it will never kill one of the people,
it will never, etc.

Thou art a bad, unesteemed man,
grown up without honour or wisdom,
a man without vigour or briskness,
who hast lost thy force and thy mettle
through thine incontinent conduct;
thou art a drunken villain —
long ago thou didst merit a whipping for drink,
long ago, etc.

Many a mildewed hunk
hast thou grasped in thy paws,
and hast stuffed with thy thumb
between thy slanting, irregular teeth;
thy gullet is bloated and yawning,
thy maw like the cur on a midden:
among gluttons thou hast first place for life,
among gluttons, etc.

The women report that,
when thou wouldst visit the shieling,
thou wouldst penetrate into the closet
in which the cheese was kept;
and when thou hadst eaten a portion,
and thou wast parched with thirst,
thou wouldst thrust thy paw in the churn,
thou wouldst thrust, etc.

Thou art a ravenous guzzler;
though thy wallet was greedy,
thy stomach hath left thee
without a morsel to show there;
a loose membrane encaseth thy kidneys,
thy lungs and thy liver
are full of disease, hollows and holes,
are full, etc.

Thy wind-pipe is choked up,
all swollen, fermented,
and become horribly putrid —
great is its need of cleansing;
every ailment is in thy body —
wasting, consumption and cough,
so that thy skin did rise from thy flesh,
so that, etc.

Thy sores and thine arteries
are full of fester and matter,
and thou art in need of succour;
thy cheeks have neuralgia,
and thou art in misery with goitre;
thy foul breath is oppressive and deadly —
pity such as sniffed off thee thy stench in the morning,
pity such, etc.

Thy teeth are serrated and gappy,
showing grey, projecting incisors;
they are rotten, carious, splintered,
bent, ugly, crooked, recurving,
criss-cross and oblique;
some of them fell out and are missing,
and those remaining have distorted thy mouth,
and those, etc.

Ever dripping, thy slavers,
in streaming blue billows
twirl down from thy lips
over the curve of thy chin;
thy frame is swarthy and dingy,
as black as the pitch;
heron-chested, hen-headed, goose-nebbed thou art,
heron-chested, etc.

Thy knobbly, bald head is peeling
and devoid of ears and ear roots;
thou art livid and skinny,
as hard as the oak tree,
and thou lackest a plaid and linen;
a pitiable object thou art in thy plight,
and thou art colder than tempest in frost,
and thou art colder, etc.

Thou hast a taper head, peak-shaped,
wry-necked, lop-sided and drooping;
a face pimpled and lowering,
and bulbous nose of the leper;
there is a hump on thy back,
and much lameness in thy knees,
and thy two feet are twisted, lean, limping, infirm,
and thy two feet, etc.

Not as much as the heels
hath the shambling, splay-footed fellow
free from chilblains and hacks;
thou art a flat-footed cripple;
full many are the tailor's misfortunes;
the world hath left him a caitiff:
pity those who took pains to rear thee in youth,
pity those, etc.

If thou art of the race of Adam,
thou dost not resemble others,
so badly hast thou developed
from thy earliest days;
relief will never come to thee
till death doth subdue thee,
and thy dun corpse is laid below the sod,
and thy dun corpse, etc.