O' a' the slee bodies that ever I saw,
The sleeist was Patie the Packman;
I'll lay ye my lugs, ere he let ye awa',
Ye'll hae cause to mind Patie the Packman:
He's a' outs an' ins, he's a' heads an' thraws,
He's a sharp-pointed humph on his back, man,
While a brass-banded box filled wi' uncas an' braws,
Smooths the hummie o' Patie the Packman.

He trots oot an' in, he rins here and there,
He's been at the moon, an' come back, man,
At bridal, at kirkin', at market, or fair,
Ye'll never miss Patie the Packman.
He 's a' gate, kens a' thing, sae dinna ye think
Ye'll ever get out o' his track, man;
Gin e'er ye're beglommered wi' love or wi' drink,
Ye'll be nailed by slee Patie the Packman.

In the bonnie grey gloamin', adown the green lane,
Gin ye tak yere ain lassie to walk, man,
When ye fain wad sit down on the auld mossy stane,
There sits little Patie the Packman.
Or gin the moonlicht wiles ye out 'mang the braird,
Or sets ye ayont the haystack, man,
What's sure to come hoastin' across the barnyard,
But " How are ye? " frae Patie the Packman.

Or whan the auld wives idly girn out their lives,
An' their noddles are a' on the rack, man,
Gin ony has seen Jockie crackin' wi' Jean,
They are seen by slee Patie the Packman.
He is sleek in the tongue, he is gleg in the een,
He is aye in the way for a crack, man,
An' there's never a knot o' true gossipers seen,
But there chatters Patie the Packman.

Be 't braws for the body, or food for the mind,
Be 't gown, ribbon, ballant, or tract, man,
Ye're sure to get a' ye are wantin' to find,
In the stowed box o' Patie the Packman.
The lassies gaun glaikit for men or for dress,
The bairnies a' skirlin' for " black-man; "
E'en wee buffy Jock, an' his daft titty Bess,
A' yaummer for Patie the Packman.

And he stots aye about, wi' his tongue and his pack,
Ye ne'er catch him wairin' a plack, man,
Till a braw merchant's shop opens up in a crack,
And there stands slee Patie the Packman.
It's gude to be pawkie, it's braw to be odd,
I'll no say slee Patie's a quack, man;
But mony wha fain wad tak up a' the road,
Maun mak room for slee Patie the Packman.