You vant to buy my dog? Ah, vell,
Dere vas n't much of him to sell.
His eye vas broke, his leg vas out,
Mid nodings else to brag about;
Und ven you ask his pedigree,
Dot make der laugh come out o' me —
It vas a madder, I be blamed,
Aboud der vich he vas ashamed.
His breed vas n't in der Catalogue,
He vas a good for nodings dog.

It vas a day I don't forgot,
Mit rain und sleet und dings like dot,
Dis homely dog he comed along
Und sing me such a hungry song
I said: " Come in und take a seat
Und have some scraps und tings to eat! "
I smile mit him, he smile mit me,
Und look like he vas glad to be,
Although not in der Catalogue,
But yust a good for nodings dog.

Each time I come around, you bet
He vag dot tail already yet;
Und show me plain from either end,
He always vant to be my friend.
No madder I say yes! or no!
Where'er I gone he bound to go.
Und ven he lost me, runs around
Und smells me out upon der ground,
Den yumps yust like he vas a frog —
Und not a good for nodings dog.

My Meenie vas a leedle tot,
Yust big enough to be like dot;
Und run about und have some play
Yust mit der dog, until von day
I call her, und she vas n't dere;
I couldn't find her anyvere; —
" Dot dog gone off, " my vife, she say,
" Und lead dot leedle girl avay: —
He vas a good for nodings dog,
Und vas n't vorth der Catalogue! "

My leedle Meenie lost! Mine Got!
I never tink I cry like dot!
But ven I found dot leedle pet,
I cry me more as effer yet: —
Dot's funny, ven a man feels glad
He cries, yust like ven he feels bad;
Der tears vas yust der same; oh, my,
But vat a difference in der cry!
Dere Meenie sat upon der log
Und pet dot good for nodings dog.

Und ven my senses all got clear,
I ask me: " Vot's der matter here? "
Und looking vere my Meenie said,
Dere lay a great big vildcat dead!
" Dot dog he killed him, " said my vife,
" Und save dot leedle Meenie's life! "
I never saw her eyes more vet,
Und vile I hug dot leedle pet
She hug dot good for nodings dog,
Vot vas n't vorth der Catalogue!

You vant to buy dot dog? Ah, vell,
Nobody's here who vants to sell.
My vife she say, " You could n't buy
Von look of kindness oud his eye! "
Und as for me — dere's not for sale,
Not e'en der vaggin' of his tail!
Und Meenie told you plendy quick,
" In all dis vorld you got your pick
Of dose vot's in der Catalogue,
But not dot good for nodings dog. "