Each time I've dined at Browber's " little flat "
He's wheezed and joked about " Con joo gal Strife " ;
Browber's convinced that 'tis a subject rife
With wit; above his cheeks of sallow fat
His bulged and yellowish eyes assure you that.
(His wife laughs too!) What jollier quip in life
Than this pretending that one beats one's wife! ...
As Browber drools he'll reach and tweak the cat.

Keen Browber knows his guests will know that none
Would frivol so unless he lived in bliss,
And often when their idiot mirth is done
His loving spouse and he exchange a kiss —
One night when they were striving thus to charm
I saw a bruise upon the poor jade's arm!