Classic Poem

Laura to Damon health doth send,
And thus salutes her saucy friend.

Because you would exert your wit,
You take the cap ne'er made to fit;
And then your sprighly verse display,
To prove me out in every way —
But I'll proceed, nor care one farthing;
Nor shall you make me sue for pardon,
Nor once recant what I asserted,
Tho' from my pen in haste it flirted.

Truly, because you do inherit
Some portion of the Dean 's queer spirit,
You want to prove, in wondrous haste,
That Laura too has Stella 's taste;
As if it must directly follow,
Since you are favour'd by Apollo,
That he his choicest gifts must send,
To ev'ry scribbling female friend.
I thank you, sir — you're wond'rous kind!
But think me not so vain or blind,
As to believe the pretty things,
Your muse, with ease, at Laura flings.

'Tis true, the moments I beguil'd,
And at a country parson smil'd;
Unhappy me! who ne'er could dream,
That you should think yourself the theme;
Unless my muse, thro' rank ill-nature,
Had turn'd what follows into satyr —

" A manner frank and debonnair,
" A heart that's open and sincere,
" Plain sense, strip'd of pedantic rules,
" And formal precepts, hatch'd in schools
" Firm honesty without parade,
" Simplicity in truth array'd;
" A sprightly vein of humour too,
" Known only by a favour'd few. "

Had Madam Muse , in spleen or spight,
Plac'd all those graces in a light,
To make us laugh, more than admire —
Then Damon might have taken fire,
And said, — ' tis past dispute and clear ,
I meant my country friend to jeer.
Yet, e'er I close — allow me time,
But just to add another rhyme.
Since I esteem your bliss so great,
In pennance you will chuse a mate,
And tell me — " I may share your fate! "
The scheme is good, I must confess,
If you have bliss, to make it less!
Yet take a hint, before resolv'd,
And in the dragging chain involv'd.
While youthful joys around you shine,
Haste not to bend at Hymen's shrine;
Let friendship, gen'rous friendship, be
The bond to fetter you and me,
Vestal, Platonic — what you will,
So virtue reigns with freedom still.
But if, in matrimonial noose,
You must be bound — and have a spouse;
The faithful rib that heav'n shall send,
I'll fondly greet, and call her friend